In a world that is so stressful and highly emotionally charged, it’s easy to take on other people’s problems. Research has even shown that emotions can be contagious, you can potentially ‘catch’ fear, anger and joy from people without even realising it. This is something I know I do. I am very susceptible to ‘catching’ people’s emotions. It’s something I really struggle with.
Are you an emotional sponge?
Being an “emotional sponge” isn’t always a bad thing. Being sensitive towards other peoples emotions, I like to think, can make you a better person.
The question ‘are you OK?’ is majorly underrated. Those three words can make someone go from feeling alone in a situation, to having an outlet. Being sensitive means you observe emotions far more than others. Being an emotional sponge means you probably worry about how someone is feeling perhaps more often than others, and can read situations differently.
Though, sometimes it’s easy to take on too much. I find this incredibly easy to do.
So, in being aware of my sponginess, I hope to be able to deal with it better and use it to my advantage. Here are a few ways I have learnt to deal with my tendency to be an emotional sponge.
- Answer this: is this feeling mine, or someone elses?Sometimes I feel such strong empathy for other people, that it can genuinely dictate my entire day. From the moment I wake up I can find myself concerned for somebody else’s emotions. I often have to put it into harsh terms, with the question: ‘is this any of your business?’Because half the time- it’s not.
- Recognise the difference between empathy and sympathy.Empathy is where you feel other people’s emotions, whereas sympathy is simply the compassion. If you empathise you’re putting yourself in their position. It’s better for you, and for you to guide other people, when you’re sympathetic, rather than emotional invested.
- Express yourself.This is something I find so difficult: saying when enough is enough. It’s important to be honest, to say ‘I’m sorry I can’t help you’. When you sit for hours and hours, listening, it is unbelievably easy to be a sponge. This is the one I find the most challenging, because often I feel that to back off can feel like you’re abandoning people.
- Distance yourself from the suspected source.If you know specific situations or individuals can bring your mood down, and perhaps you’re particularly vulnerable to it at this time, remove yourself from the situation. I find this equally hard, especially as I like to help people and despise seeing people feeling isolated.
- Talk to other people. If you’re concerned for somebody it’s easy to take on the role of ‘the rock’by yourself. But speaking to other people about it really can help. This keeps your own mental health in check. I always remind myself that I am far more helpful if I, myself, am happy.
I refuse to think of being sensitive as a weakness. To me, it is a strength. But sometimes you have to put number one first and that means taking a step back. I’ve learnt to accept that I am not responsible for others.
This is a personal struggle I am attempting to overcome- I want to be more sympathetic in life and a little less empathetic.
Have you ever woken up with a throbbing sensation on your face, wandered into the bathroom and discovered that Mount Vesuvius grew on your face over night? This is the plague of teenage years (and often years after- sorry girls!)
First things first- spots are normal! It’s natural to compare yourself to others, but make sure it’s to an attainable image. By this, I mean a lot of people, particularly celebrities, are airbrushed. Even then, there are apps that can help ‘normal’ people to airbrush themselves too.
I pulled together some celebrities that have suffered with their skin:
Miley Cyrus: someone who had to live her teenage years in the spotlight claimed that “I used to have really bad breakouts. My mom took me in to see a doctor and we sorted that out. But it made me really insecure.”
Lorde: she took to Twitter in 2014 to post an unedited picture of herself, that she contrasted with one that had been altered. She encouraged fans to embrace their imperfections. She even uploaded a picture of herself to show fans the acne cream she puts on before bed.
Victoria Beckham: has apparently struggles with skin for years. Apparently she was even nicknamed ‘spotty spice’ by some haters. She found a dermatologist and used his products to clear up her skin.
The point is: everyone struggles with blemishes, especially in your teenage years. It’s all about finding something that works best for your skin and sticking to it!
Here are some Home Remedies for you to try out!
- Thought one of the best home remedies by far. It’s an antibacterial, and it cleans and moisturises your skin. With this, it has a mild bleaching affect and prevents scarring.
- Method: put a drop of honey on the spot, leave it for an hour and wash it off!
- Any white toothpaste has anti-inflammatory qualities in it.
- It can even be used as a scrub, when mixed with salt, to remove black heads and clean your face.
- Oh and this is all Gigi Hadid uses soooo….
- Methods: My all time go-to if I’m caught out. If I haven’t got my full blown skin care regime with me, then toothpaste it is! You apply it and leave it to dry. I often leave it over night, the minty fresh smell doesn’t bother me, and I find it generally works better.
3) ICE. (ICE BABY)
- An anti-inflammatory, it fights inflammation and prevents swelling and pus when used on time. This is a great method to use if you have an event or photos in a few hours time- it makes it that bit less obvious and a lot easier to cover up!
- Method: hold/rub it on and around the spot.
4) BAKING SODA.
- If you fancy raiding your Mum’s baking cupboard, Baking Soda is surprisingly another anti-inflammatory. I use this (or toothpaste) over night.
- Method: simply mix it with water and quickly apply it to the spot, and the area surrounding it. It sets quickly though, so watch out for that! To wash it off later, use luke warm water and it will fall off in flake.
- This cleanses the pours and tightens the skin. It also feels great!
- Method: once you’ve taken your makeup off, but before cleansing, steam your face. This can simply be that you’ve run hot water in the sink and you lean over it for a few minutes. It will mean that the cleansing etc following this will be super effective.
6) LEMON JUICE.
- The acids in lemons keeps the skin dry and clean. Another perk is that it’s full of vitamin C helps to tighten your skin and acts as an anti-aging agent.
- Method: mix lemon juice and honey to keep your skin hydrated and the pimple dry. It also draws out the pus (woo!)
- Method: grating cucumber and putting it over the spot acts as an inflammatory.
- Needs must! If you eat lots of garlic it can prevent pimples in the first place. But, as another anti-bacterial, it can also be placed directly on the spot.
- Method: place it on the spot, for a few hours, or over night. To get rid of the garlic-y whiff you can simply rub some toothpaste over it.
Just remember people don’t remember when you had a spot- because people don’t do that! Even with Mount Vesuvius you are b-e-a-utiful!
Embrace those flaws!