Me: marmite sandwiches, zombies and imperfections.

Me: marmite sandwiches, zombies and imperfections.

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I am Bronwyn. My closest friends and family call me Bee. I have a little scar next to my eye from standing on a chair in nursery, shouting at the top of my lungs for a marmite sandwich and an undying love for foam bananas. I’m terrified of zombies (despite the fact I know they don’t exist). Having worked in a baby shop and children’s nurseries- I know a ridiculous amount about babies without ever having had one (and for some reason I could list off 15 pushchair brands, but struggle to recall what I learnt last week at Uni). I love cats, but fear them equally- for I find them peculiarly unpredictable creatures. I study history because I enjoyed it and it seemed to close the least doors for me in life. I’m an open book, my emotions are splashed across my face the second I feel them, I’m oversensitive, silly 80% of the time, prone to over-apologising and ultimately imperfect, but not insignificant. I am a people person. I like to please. I am working on accepting that not everyone will like me all of the time- and that’s OK. I have been, and still am, vulnerable at times and have found confidence isn’t borne out of things going right, often confidence grows when, quite frankly, the shit hits the fan.

I am a work in progress. I am enough. I belong. I am me: perfectly imperfect.

Remember you are too. Your best is enough. You belong. You are fiercely loved. You are perfectly imperfect.

Why University Boosted My Confidence

Why University Boosted My Confidence

Forever a home bird, I found moving out and going to University difficult. Despite people telling me about this incredible new chapter/ season/ adventure I was about to experience, I honestly wasn’t overly buzzed to go. Which sounds dreadful, because most people I speak to are so excited for University. That’s not to say I wasn’t looking forward to it entirely, I just wasn’t as ecstatic as my friends. To me, it just felt like I was leaving behind my family and my boyfriend and stepping completely out of my comfort zone. It forced me to do things independently and my confidence in myself grew.

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I became comfortable in my own company.

It’s funny how our minds embellish things, when I think back to my parents dropping me off at my halls of residence, I picture me stood in my room, surrounded by my stuff- simply wanting to cry. Which is actually super sad. I remember forcing myself to walk into the kitchen, introduce myself and make a cup of tea. I wasn’t to know, at that point, that my flat and I weren’t going to ‘click’ (What People Don’t Tell You About University). I think this is a general misconception. I honestly don’t know anyone who has got along with everyone in their flat. But I know pleeeenty of people who met friends on their course and through societies. Anyway, I ended up spending a lot of time on my own- and most of the time I liked it. I got into YouTube (a lot) and I started blogging. I skyped my boyfriend and family once a day too. I was comfortable in my own company. Though, I did find it hard to adapt to. Now the idea of being alone doesn’t intimidate me, but I know for sure that I prefer being with other people.

I could start a conversation with anyone.

I decided that as my flat and I didn’t ‘click’ I would make new friends. I mastered the art of walking up to people I barely knew and inviting them to coffee. Maybe I did come across loopy. But I felt lonely. I liked being on my own for short periods of time, but I needed to socialise. Otherwise I would have gone crazy. I had recently watched ‘We Bought A Zoo’ and one of the characters said that all you need is 10 seconds of courage. And that’s how I justified it. Because once I’d said ‘do you fancy going for a coffee?’ it was out there and I couldn’t take it back, no matter how silly I felt. I went on quite a few coffee trips, meals out and started being invited to social events outside my flat. So it worked and it boosted my confidence! One of the things that bothered me most was that I worried I was the problem. This proved that I wasn’t.

I realised I was OK.

That was one of the biggest, and most important lessons  University taught me. I had struggled at school and had quite low confidence. College was good for me in that sense, but I became far more confident at University. I ended up thinking that if I smiled, waved or spoke to someone and they didn’t do it back it was their problem, not mine. What’s the worst that could happen when you wave at someone and they don’t wave back? You look overly friendly? I mean over friendly has never offended me.

I was confident in my own decisions.

I didn’t particularly enjoy my Freshers, I had a rather unfortunate experience on my first Freshers event, and it really affected me. I felt quite uncomfortable on nights out and I realised pretty quickly I wasn’t going to be peer pressured into anything I didn’t want to do. This was something I felt really strongly about. I did, and still do, only go out if I have my ‘wingman’ (or woman!) with me. I’ve never felt entirely comfortable with clubbing, it’s just something I get quite anxious about- and my solution was surrounding myself in people I trust. People I know wouldn’t leave me alone in a club, feeling vulnerable. This confidence through making decisions for myself made me far more self confident. I socialised with who I wanted and when. Even now, I try really hard not to give into peer pressure.

 

University hasn’t been the easiest journey for me, but it taught me a lot about myself and what I want out of life. I would love to hear if you learnt any life lessons at University, had a bad experience or feel like an experience has shaped you as a person.

 

50 ways to prevent feeling overwhelmed- taking back control and self-care

50 ways to prevent feeling overwhelmed- taking back control and self-care

  1. Make a weekly “to-do” list.
  2. Mind-map all the little things playing on your mind- no matter how seemingly insignificant.
  3. Have a weekly pamper session- tan, nails, hair etc.
  4. Take a hot bath.
  5. Remind yourself of your importance.
  6. Lay in the sunshine.
  7. Make your bed.
  8. Choose a new book to read.
  9. Put on fresh comfortable clothing.
  10. Re-read one of your favourite books.
  11. Allow yourself to laugh.
  12. Choose tomorrows outfit before bed.
  13. Try a new walk.
  14. Turn your phone off for a whole day.
  15. Watch an all-time favourite movie.
  16. Ask someone for advice or help.
  17. Book a short break away.
  18. Spend time with animals.
  19. Have a good cry.
  20. Say no when you start feeling overwhelmed.
  21. Go to the seaside.
  22. Throw out, or give to charity, your old clothes.
  23. Sing like nobody else can hear you.
  24. Get up early- make the most of every day.
  25. Make spontaneous plans.
  26. Listen to peaceful music.
  27. Take multi-vitamins.
  28. Write down your goals and stick them somewhere you see them every day.
  29. Do something creative- crafts, knit, sew etc.
  30. Let it go.
  31. Treat yourself, have a cake or a pizza every now and then.
  32. Get an early night.
  33. Make a list of all the things you are thankful for.
  34. Healthy body, healthy mind.
  35. Unplug from social media.
  36. Take a nap.
  37. Hug someone for longer than 10 seconds- it’s proven to relieve stress.
  38. Surround yourself with people that make you happy.
  39. Declutter your home/ room.
  40. Write your feelings down in a journal.
  41. Step out of your comfort zone- cook a new recipe.
  42. Sit in the garden or in the park for an hour and watch the world go by.
  43. Eat a healthy diet.
  44. Have a pyjama day.
  45. Do some baking.
  46. Listen to your favourite song.
  47. Wear your favourite perfume.
  48. Get a haircut.
  49. Go outside, lie on your back and watch the sky.
  50. Call someone you love.
Self-Confidence is the Most Attractive Quality a Person Can Have

Self-Confidence is the Most Attractive Quality a Person Can Have

“There is nothing more rare, nor more beautiful, than a woman being unapologetically herself; comfortable in her perfect imperfection. To me, that is the true essence of beauty” –  Steve Maraboli, Unapologetically You: Reflections on Life and the Human Experience.

Be yourself. Self-confidence is the most attractive quality a person can have.

Summer shopping this year has been an interesting experience. For some unknown reason my body decided to grow big ass hips when I hit 19, resulting in great frustration when my shorts from last summer wouldn’t fit.

It’s pretty easy to compare your figure to other peoples’. I went to the beach with a group of school friends last week, and we all have such different figures. Some look the same as they did at school. Others have changed rather drastically.

Everyone is different. I would love to feel great in a pair denim hot pants. I just don’t. But this year, I’ve really gotten into cotton shorts. I ordered several pairs from Boohoo and LOVE THEM. I’ve got a few lacey ones, some patterned ones and brightly coloured ones. And I feel good in them.

Maraboli is so right. The girls I look at and envy- do I envy them because they look good in things I perhaps wouldn’t? Yes. But is their air of confidence equally as enviable? Hell yeah.

Be unapologetically yourself. If you got a booty- flaunt it. If you can pull off skimpy bikinis- do so.

Wear what makes YOU feel good. What you see as imperfect, others will see as perfect.