Dear whoever may need it,

Dear whoever may need it,

Here is a Thursday pick me up!

Dear whoever may need it,

Sometimes things don’t go to plan and they are the opposite of EASY. You’re not the only one having a bad day… or month… or year! You are not alone, it’s the truest thing I can say to you.screen-shot-2018-04-12-at-13-37-40.png

We have all been undone. Then we get put back together, piece by piece and when we find someone else who is suffering we understand deeper and wider. Because we get it.

We all must fight some battles and jump through hoops in this crazy adventure we call life. Some fights, nobody knows about… things change in our lives, sometimes for better or worse.

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Some days can be foggy, and you must realise that it’s OK not to be OK all of the time.

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You will laugh again. So hard that your stomach aches and tears spill out.

You will look back and thank God that you’re on this side of the storm, and then you will thank yourself because it turns out you’re stronger than you realised.

You are loved. You are worthy. You are enough. You are strong. You are good.

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Life will get sunnier.

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DISCLAIMER: The pictures I used are Emily Coxhead’s the creator of the Happy News. She’s awesome and I love her little notes to boost my spirits!

Let’s Not Compare Ourselves To Strangers On Instagram

Let’s Not Compare Ourselves To Strangers On Instagram

This is the picture I uploaded to Instagram following my crappy email from my Dissertation email- the Instagram post that prompted this blog post!

16 million people in the UK experience a mental illness. 3 in 4 mental illnesses start in childhood. 75% of young people with mental health problems are not being treated.  Suicide is the biggest killer of young people in the UK. A study recently showed that more than A THIRD of teenage girls in England suffer from depression and anxiety.

These are some scary figures. Though social media is not the only reason for this, I think it has a huge impact. Our lives are not perfect, but nobody’s is. We’re humans, we all have sadness, worries, family issues, friendship struggles and all the crap that goes in-between. But we don’t publicise it online very often because it’s private, we don’t want people knowing.

Scrolling through your Instagram feed and seeing everyone else’s seemingly magical life can leave you feeling alone in life hurdles. It’s hard not to think everyone else’s life is perfect when you only ever see the best bits, the fun, the laughter, the happiness and the celebration of life. But this isn’t ReALiTy.

We all do it, we show the best bits of our lives. We need to talk more, and by talk I mean honest talkSocial media is never an honest representation of how that person really feels. Ask people how they are doing, even if their lives seem rosey through Instagram. A simple ‘hey, how are you?’ can open an honest conversation about LiFe.

Putting on a ‘brave face’ is so easy when you’re sat behind a phone, or a laptop, uploading to Instagram, Twitter or Facebook. But let’s be ReAl, we all know its a bunch of fibs. Life is beautifully imperfect. You have to have the bad days, for the good days to shine so bright.

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Yesterday, I posted on my Instagram about an email I got from my Dissertation Tutor, that quite frankly was a pile of poop (if you want to check it out, click here). Again, something I haven’t really discussed on Instagram, Twitter or my Blog is the University Strikes. Something that has affected me in a HUGE way. But I haven’t spoken about it much as it’s one of the naffest parts of my life right now. But yesterday, as I sat at my desk, opened up my emails and was told that my Dissertation (that I have practically written over the last 4 weeks) included themes my Tutor deemed ‘irrelevant’- I decided I would talk about it (following a melt down and a pep talk from my boyfriend). Due to the strikes, I have had little to no contact with her, so cracked on with my work, thinking all was good. I thought my dissertation plan had been approved- as I hadn’t received feedback- and I would make the most of the 4 weeks of strikes. Anyway, I decided to email back saying that I had already written these sections and I believed they were relevant. I even told her why, in depth. So I’m awaiting a response and hopefully I will have convinced her.

This totally HoNeSt Instagram post, written with puffy eyes and butterflies, gave me some of the best feedback I have had to date. People were so sweet, giving me encouragement and saying they had experienced similar things. It made me realise, people identify a whole lot more to the ReALiTiEs. These realities of life include the down days.

So if you’re feeling low and you feel comfortable sharing it on social media, you could touch someone else who is struggling. We all fight battles, some of which nobody knows about. Some days are a little bit foggy and we have to realise its OK not to be OK all of the time.

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YoU aRe NoT aLoNe.

Bee xoxo

Spots, Zits, Blips and Pimples: Home Remedies and Top Tips

Spots, Zits, Blips and Pimples: Home Remedies and Top Tips

Have you ever woken up with a throbbing sensation on your face,  wandered into the bathroom and discovered that Mount Vesuvius grew on your face over night? This is the plague of teenage years (and often years after- sorry girls!)

First things first- spots are normal! It’s natural to compare yourself to others, but make sure it’s to an attainable image. By this, I mean a lot of people, particularly celebrities, are airbrushed. Even then, there are apps that can help ‘normal’ people to airbrush themselves too.

I pulled together some celebrities that have suffered with their skin:

Miley Cyrus: someone who had to live her teenage years in the spotlight claimed that “I used to have really bad breakouts. My mom took me in to see a doctor and we sorted that out. But it made me really insecure.”

Lorde: she took to Twitter in 2014 to post an unedited picture of herself, that she contrasted with one that had been altered. She encouraged fans to embrace their imperfections. She even uploaded a picture of herself to show fans the acne cream she puts on before bed. Normal teen: The 17-year-old posted a photo of herself covered in skin cream, with the caption, 'In bed in Paris with my acne cream on', last month

Victoria Beckham: has apparently struggles with skin for years. Apparently she was even nicknamed ‘spotty spice’ by some haters. She found a dermatologist and used his products to clear up her skin.

The point is: everyone struggles with blemishes, especially in your teenage years. It’s all about finding something that works best for your skin and sticking to it!

Here are some Home Remedies for you to try out!

1) HONEY.honey.jpg

  • Thought one of the best home remedies by far. It’s an antibacterial, and it cleans and moisturises your skin. With this, it has a mild bleaching affect and prevents scarring.
  • Method: put a drop of honey on the spot, leave it for an hour and wash it off!

2) TOOTHPASTE. toothpaste

  • Any white toothpaste has anti-inflammatory qualities in it.
  • It can even be used as a scrub, when mixed with salt, to remove black heads and clean your face.
  • Oh and this is all Gigi Hadid uses soooo….
  • Methods: My all time go-to if I’m caught out. If I haven’t got my full blown skin care regime with me, then toothpaste it is! You apply it and leave it to dry. I often leave it over night, the minty fresh smell doesn’t bother me, and I find it generally works better.

3) ICE. (ICE BABY)

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  • An anti-inflammatory, it fights inflammation and prevents swelling and pus when used on time. This is a great method to use if you have an event or photos in a few hours time- it makes it that bit less obvious and a lot easier to cover up!
  • Method: hold/rub it on and around the spot.

4) BAKING SODA. baking-soa.jpg

  • If you fancy raiding your Mum’s baking cupboard, Baking Soda is surprisingly another anti-inflammatory. I use this (or toothpaste) over night.
  • Method: simply mix it with water and quickly apply it to the spot, and the area surrounding it. It sets quickly though, so watch out for that! To wash it off later, use luke warm water and it will fall off in flake.

5) STEAM.

  • This cleanses the pours and tightens the skin. It also feels great!
  • Method: once you’ve taken your makeup off, but before cleansing, steam your face. This can simply be that you’ve run hot water in the sink and you lean over it for a few minutes. It will mean that the cleansing etc following this will be super effective.

6) LEMON JUICE. lemon.jpg

  • The acids in lemons keeps the skin dry and clean. Another perk is that it’s full of vitamin C helps to tighten your skin and acts as an anti-aging agent.
  • Method: mix lemon juice and honey to keep your skin hydrated and the pimple dry. It also draws out the pus (woo!)

7) CUCUMBER. cucumber.jpg

  • Method: grating cucumber and putting it over the spot acts as an inflammatory.

8) GARLIC. garlic.jpg

  • Needs must! If you eat lots of garlic it can prevent pimples in the first place. But, as another anti-bacterial, it can also be placed directly on the spot.
  • Method: place it on the spot, for a few hours, or over night. To get rid of the garlic-y whiff you can simply rub some toothpaste over it.

Just remember people don’t remember when you had a spot- because people don’t do that! Even with Mount Vesuvius you are b-e-a-utiful!

Embrace those flaws! 

Bee xoxo

The Realities of Working Out

The Realities of Working Out

I am what I like to call: Fit(ish).

Fit(ish): semi-fit and a little bit podgy. Someone that likes the idea of being fit, but likes food too much.

I strive to be healthy. To me, this means two things. To be physically fitand active, and eat a healthy balanced diet. And mentally fit, whereby (to avoid mental breakdowns, and maintain sanity) I eat cake when and if I want it. I think it’s a pretty healthy diet. I would never want to resent being ‘healthy’ if it meant I couldn’t eat birthday cake, or have a takeaway every now and then. I’m a firm believer in treatin’ yo self. 

But that’s enough natter, here are some of the realities I have found with working out!

CARDIO:

Getting bored after 5 minutes of any form of cardio. I have always hated running. I simply don’t enjoy it. But I do try. (I’m far better at running out of money, if I’m honest)will.gif

Running next to someone and it feeling like a race. They up the speed, so do I. Bring it. run.gif

My running style: drunk woman slowly being chased by absolutely nothing.drunk.gif

When you take your headphones out and realise you were making panting/grunting noiseswhile you did cardio.sponge.gif

When people look at you while you do cardio.melissa

When you up the speed too much and your heart skips a beat, because you can’t keep up.gym.gif

Me doing cardio: ’20 minutes left. That’s two lots of 10.  It’s only 4 lots of 5 minutes’(then I congratulate myself on the 30 seconds wasted on that mental maths session)wil.gif

I like to think, when people see me jogging outside, they think ‘wow an athlete’, but in reality it’s ‘aw, good for her’.

Quite frankly, the best bit about running is the end.

I’ve honestly come to the conclusion that running is wrong. I agree with Miranda Hart,unless it’s running professionally, or as a child- it’s not OK.

SWIMMING: 

Is this just me? As a kid, at swimming lessons, I would convince myself there was a shark in the pool– so I would swim faster. Maybe I should imagine clowns on the treadmill behind me.shark.gif

MOTTO’S I THINK IN THE GYM/LIFE:

‘Sweat is just my fat crying’.

‘I may look like a potato now, but one day I’ll turn into fries and you’ll all want me then.’

‘I work out because I know I would have been the first to die in the Hunger Games.’

‘I wear all black in the gym, like a funeral for my fat.’

REGRETS: 

When your ‘cheat meal’ turns into a cheat week.shame.gif

Stepping on the scales and seeing no change after weeks of exercise: ‘off to Krispy Kreme I go’.donunt.gif

Leaving the gym feeling great, waking up the next morning feeling like your legs are hungover.
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FIBS:

Aim:to be the weight I told the app I was.

‘Drink more water’ they said, ‘it will be good for you’ they said. I’m weeing ALL THE TIME.

(Last time I did that 2 litre a day thing, my Mum sent me to the Doctors thinking I had diabetes.)

My summer body expectations vs reality. summer.png

Embracing your summer body like at least my flipflops still fit!fat b 2.gif

So there it is, a page full of GIF’s, personal experiences and life contemplations, from a Fit(ish) individual with some serious love for cake. 

No Woman Should Be Embarrassed Of Her Body- Body Truths

No Woman Should Be Embarrassed Of Her Body- Body Truths

Fat shaming, skinny shaming, booty shaming, boob shaming- are such common occurrences on social media. And if you take one thing from this blog, please, please, please let it be this- ‘your body is perfect’. Nature did not make a woopsy daisy when it made you. You are a fully functioning, beautiful human bean! Arm hair, leg hair, spots and periods- yup that makes you a woman.

Here is a picture of the worlds biggest sex icon. Her tummy isn’t tightly toned, her thighs touch, her arms aren’t skinny, she has stretch marks and her boobs aren’t perfect. She is known as one of the MOST BEAUTIFUL WOMEN IN HISTORY. Be you with confidence.

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Make body decisions that are right for you.

You own that body, you do with it what you wish. I remember at school, I used to dread getting changed for PE. The silliest of things would worry me, including whether or not I shaved my legs the night before! Let’s be real, how many times have you clocked someone not shaving their legs and actually cared?

Oh and those wonderful things we call stretch marks. They’re such an odd thing for us to be self conscious about. I mean, they are literal marks to show we are women. They fade, the grow- and they can even disappear with certain products, like coconut oil! Our bodies are pure magic, they stretch, they grow, they even create new life- wear your stripes with pride.

Your weight.

This is one very close to my heart. I remember in school I used to compare myself to those around me constantly. I wasn’t big, but I have never been teeny tiny either. And that’s OK. Your weight is a number.

I, personally, really dislike scales. I have never hopped off the scales feeling anything but inadequate. This disappointment, personally, does not drive me to be healthier. It literally drives me to Krispy Kreme. I am 5 ft 3 and, according to BMI, I am overweight. I go to the gym 3 to 4 times a week, I have an active lifestyle and I eat healthily too. I certainly don’t look fat. One of my least favourite words ever. 

So remember, weight is just a number.

Something ‘jiggling’ is normal.

Girls, and boys alike, have bellies. Bellies that jiggle. Some more than others. If you want to see a beautifully fit, but completely real woman- check out Chessie King‘s Instagram. She’s a total gym bunny and is great for boosting body confidence, she uploads a lot of Instagram vs Realities.

Make sure you focus on the things that you love about yourself, as well as the your insecurities.

Channel you inner Meghan Trainor:

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Some people don’t have thigh gaps. 

Thigh gaps are biological, it’s the width of you pelvis that determines whether or not you have one. Some things are never meant to be!

Some people do have thigh gaps. 

We shouldn’t shame people that do, nor should we shame people that don’t. It’s normal to appreciate somebody elses’ features, or even envy them. But don’t forget you are unique, and that’s what makes each and one of us beautiful.

Your nose is perfectly proportioned in every way.

We use noses to smell- fact. Who on earth came up with the ‘ideal’ nose? Our bodies are perfectly proportioned, from the length of your legs, to the width of your hips. Your nose is too. It really bothers me that the size of shape of noses could be used as an insult. No matter what shape, or size- it’s perfect.

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Your laugh is beautiful.

Happiness always shines through. Have you ever read the Twits? I read it when I was little, and it’s stayed with me since. Roald Dahl is spot on.

“If a person has ugly thoughts, it begins to show on the face. And when that person has ugly thoughts every day, every week, every year, the face gets uglier and uglier until you can hardly bear to look at it.

A person who has good thoughts cannot ever be ugly. You can have a wonky nose and a crooked mouth and a double chin and stick-out teeth, but if you have good thoughts it will shine out of your face like sunbeams and you will always look lovely.”

Beauty is imbedded in happiness. Laugh often. Hysterics are actually fantastic for your health. There is nothing better than the feeling of hysterical laughter, or making someone else laugh.

Your feet are not too big.

Again, it’s funny how we can see feet as something potentially ‘beautiful’. I mean, I think they’re pretty funny looking, on everyone. Don’t compare your feet to others. They will carry you through every adventure in life– so if they end up wrinkly, or blistered or I don’t know what- they’re there for a purpose!

It is so easy to automatically put yourself down, constantly. We all do it, ‘I feel fat in these jeans’ or ‘my skin looks terrible today’. Let’s stop shaming, in every variation, and embrace our bodies for what they are. Instead of ‘fat talk’, we should empower each other. Value your body, look after it- you deserve to feel healthy and beautiful as the person you truly are. 

 

 

 

New Series: ‘Teenage Struggles’

New Series: ‘Teenage Struggles’

Hi everybody,

I have recently turned 21. And with this came the realisation that I’m no longer a teen. I mean, that was obvious when I turned 20 as well, but it really hit home on my 21st birthday. I’m no longer just out of my teenage years. I’m in my twenties.

It got me thinking. I experienced a lot of the stereotypical things that teenagers go through, from spots of every kind, periods from hell and body changes that seemed totally premature. I also had my fair share of mortifying moments, from embarrassing crushes, rejection, splitting my trousers at school and sitting in chewing gum (my own!!)- to list a few!

Basically your teenage years are a whirlwind of emotions- and sometimes completely crap. I have a 14 year old sister and I watch her going through exactly the same things as I did. So I thought I would start a series of blogs all about ‘teenage struggles’. I absolutely love writing my ‘girl problem’ series, and I thought I could share my own experiences (and ultimately what I’ve learnt!) with you.

So here it is, my official introduction to my new series ‘Teenage Struggles’, because the #struggleisreal 🙌

So cheers to raging hormones, friendship struggles, big ass spots that appear on school photo day and the emergence of wobbly bits! And all the things that make us stronger women💪

I will be uploading one a week (🤞) and will be posting about these on my instagram too (@abeesworld)!

Bee xoxo

Girl Struggles

Girl Struggles

There are so many reasons that being a girl rules. For example, we never catch anything when pulling our flies up! Plus, on a more catastrophic note, the world literally wouldn’t exist without women #girlpower.

But in today’s blog I’m going to talk about the realities of being a girl. The #girlstruggles. Here are the things us girls have to put up with:

  1. Dry Shampoo- either a life saver or adds 30 years onto your age, most of the time I find myself weighing up whether to look like Mrs Claus in August or Filch, from Harry Potter.
  2. Having “Man Dolphin” legs- a term I use to describe my legs when I haven’t shaved for a while (when I have they are as smooooth as a dolphin- for like a day!). I feel like “Man Dolphin” is a winter comfort!
  3. Having one “Man Dolphin” leg… how I forget one entire limb I don’t know.
  4. Shaving your armpits- I’m sure there is a perfectly good scientific reason for having hair under your arms, but sometimes it seems like it was part of God’s punishment to Eve. Like why is it there? Why does it grow so fast? Why do I always manage to miss some?
  5. Owning ultra-comfy/mega-old bra- that one you hang onto even though it’s slightly grey, ripping at the seams and the underwire will shortly try and burst a lung. But you can’t find it anywhere else soooo…
  6. On a similar note, the “holy pants”- (I really friggin hope others have this too!) a pair of pants that are your favourite. Super comfy, probably from M&S, that have been worn within an inch of their lives. And are ultimately holey, aka “holy”. Amen.
  7. Strapless bras- a seemingly good idea, until two hours into wearing it, it’s hugging your belly button.
  8. Trying to gracefully get out of a sports bra- an impossible task.
  9. Sanitary Products- needs little explaining. They’re expensive and annoying.
  10. Getting a ladder in your tights- the MOST frustrating thing!
  11. Thongs- weighing up whether the lack of VPL (Visible Pant Line) is worth the hours worth of wedgey.
  12. Jean sizing- every shop is different. I don’t ask for much, I just want something that sucks everything in, holds it in place, makes me have a Kim Kardashian bum and look two sizes smaller, please, thank you, ta.
  13. Bobby pins getting into every nook and cranny- hoovers, washing machines, handbags, pockets…
  14. Smudging freshly painted nails- super frustrating.
  15. Losing earrings back- who hasn’t been on all fours scanning the carpet looking for one of those sodding things?
  16. Streaky fake tan- the patchy, albino cow look is never a good one.
  17. Major break outs- usually the day before you need to look good. I find it’s before school photos, parties or dates.
  18. Hair getting everywhere -.-
  19. The aftermath of heels- blisters and sore soles of feet are enough to make any gal mad.
  20. Losing your underwear in the laundry- besides the usual loss of knickers at home, genuinely through the washing machine, I had one super creepy encounter at University. If you didn’t get there in time to take your washing out of the dryer yourself- people sometimes nicked it! Tell me, who actually wants someone elses knickers?!
  21. Asking for a trim at the hairdressers- and coming out with a friggin bob.
  22. Legs rubbing- the bane of my life on holiday. It’s the worst feeling.
  23. Applying eyeliner- one wing is always higher than the other and I literally cannot talk while I apply it.
  24. Wearing a skirt on a windy day- how did Marilyn Monroe make it look cute?!
  25. Queueing for the girls loo in any club or even event *raises gun to head*
  26. Trying for a smokey eye look- experimenting with a new eyeshadow but ending up sporting the “black eye” look.
  27. Jumpsuits or bodysuits in the toilet- like a friggin puzzle. Not only do you need a wee, you’re worried everyone in the queue thinks you’re taking ages to pee and, as the random spurt of claustrophobia kicks in, you end up hitting your desperately flailing arms on the cubical walls. It’s a mess really.
  28. Windy days + lipstick.
  29. The word “smart-casual”- what does that mean?! For guys its shirts, jeans and a decent pair of shoes… but girls?!
  30. Sneezing when you just put your mascara on.

So there you go, 30 #girlstruggles! Hope you enjoyed reading,

Bee

xoxox