I Am An Emotional Sponge

I Am An Emotional Sponge

In a world that is so stressful and highly emotionally charged, it’s easy to take on other people’s problems. Research has even shown that emotions can be contagious, you can potentially ‘catch’ fear, anger and joy from people without even realising it. This is something I know I do. I am very susceptible to ‘catching’ people’s emotions. It’s something I really struggle with.

Are you an emotional sponge?

Being an “emotional sponge” isn’t always a bad thing. Being sensitive towards other peoples emotions, I like to think, can make you a better person.

The question ‘are you OK?’ is majorly underrated. Those three words can make someone go from feeling alone in a situation, to having an outlet. Being sensitive means you observe emotions far more than others. Being an emotional sponge means you probably worry about how someone is feeling perhaps more often than others, and can read situations differently.

Though, sometimes it’s easy to take on too much. I find this incredibly easy to do.

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So, in being aware of my sponginess, I hope to be able to deal with it better and use it to my advantage.  Here are a few ways I have learnt to deal with my tendency to be an emotional sponge.

  • Answer this: is this feeling mine, or someone elses?Sometimes I feel such strong empathy for other people, that it can genuinely dictate my entire day. From the moment I wake up I can find myself concerned for somebody else’s emotions. I often have to put it into harsh terms, with the question: ‘is this any of your business?’Because half the time- it’s not.
  • Recognise the difference between empathy and sympathy.Empathy is where you feel other people’s emotions, whereas sympathy is simply the compassion. If you empathise you’re putting yourself in their position. It’s better for you, and for you to guide other people, when you’re sympathetic, rather than emotional invested.
  • Express yourself.This is something I find so difficult: saying when enough is enough. It’s important to be honest, to say I’m sorry I can’t help you’. When you sit for hours and hours, listening, it is unbelievably easy to be a sponge. This is the one I find the most challenging, because often I feel that to back off can feel like you’re abandoning people.
  • Distance yourself from the suspected source.If you know specific situations or individuals can bring your mood down, and perhaps you’re particularly vulnerable to it at this time, remove yourself from the situation. I find this equally hard, especially as I like to help people and despise seeing people feeling isolated.
  • Talk to other people. If you’re concerned for somebody it’s easy to take on the role of ‘the rock’by yourself. But speaking to other people about it really can help. This keeps your own mental health in check. I always remind myself that I am far more helpful if I, myself, am happy.

I refuse to think of being sensitive as a weakness. To me, it is a strength. But sometimes you have to put number one first and that means taking a step back. I’ve learnt to accept that I am not responsible for others.

This is a personal struggle I am attempting to overcome- I want to be more sympathetic in life and a little less empathetic.

Let’s Not Compare Ourselves To Strangers On Instagram

Let’s Not Compare Ourselves To Strangers On Instagram

This is the picture I uploaded to Instagram following my crappy email from my Dissertation email- the Instagram post that prompted this blog post!

16 million people in the UK experience a mental illness. 3 in 4 mental illnesses start in childhood. 75% of young people with mental health problems are not being treated.  Suicide is the biggest killer of young people in the UK. A study recently showed that more than A THIRD of teenage girls in England suffer from depression and anxiety.

These are some scary figures. Though social media is not the only reason for this, I think it has a huge impact. Our lives are not perfect, but nobody’s is. We’re humans, we all have sadness, worries, family issues, friendship struggles and all the crap that goes in-between. But we don’t publicise it online very often because it’s private, we don’t want people knowing.

Scrolling through your Instagram feed and seeing everyone else’s seemingly magical life can leave you feeling alone in life hurdles. It’s hard not to think everyone else’s life is perfect when you only ever see the best bits, the fun, the laughter, the happiness and the celebration of life. But this isn’t ReALiTy.

We all do it, we show the best bits of our lives. We need to talk more, and by talk I mean honest talkSocial media is never an honest representation of how that person really feels. Ask people how they are doing, even if their lives seem rosey through Instagram. A simple ‘hey, how are you?’ can open an honest conversation about LiFe.

Putting on a ‘brave face’ is so easy when you’re sat behind a phone, or a laptop, uploading to Instagram, Twitter or Facebook. But let’s be ReAl, we all know its a bunch of fibs. Life is beautifully imperfect. You have to have the bad days, for the good days to shine so bright.

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Yesterday, I posted on my Instagram about an email I got from my Dissertation Tutor, that quite frankly was a pile of poop (if you want to check it out, click here). Again, something I haven’t really discussed on Instagram, Twitter or my Blog is the University Strikes. Something that has affected me in a HUGE way. But I haven’t spoken about it much as it’s one of the naffest parts of my life right now. But yesterday, as I sat at my desk, opened up my emails and was told that my Dissertation (that I have practically written over the last 4 weeks) included themes my Tutor deemed ‘irrelevant’- I decided I would talk about it (following a melt down and a pep talk from my boyfriend). Due to the strikes, I have had little to no contact with her, so cracked on with my work, thinking all was good. I thought my dissertation plan had been approved- as I hadn’t received feedback- and I would make the most of the 4 weeks of strikes. Anyway, I decided to email back saying that I had already written these sections and I believed they were relevant. I even told her why, in depth. So I’m awaiting a response and hopefully I will have convinced her.

This totally HoNeSt Instagram post, written with puffy eyes and butterflies, gave me some of the best feedback I have had to date. People were so sweet, giving me encouragement and saying they had experienced similar things. It made me realise, people identify a whole lot more to the ReALiTiEs. These realities of life include the down days.

So if you’re feeling low and you feel comfortable sharing it on social media, you could touch someone else who is struggling. We all fight battles, some of which nobody knows about. Some days are a little bit foggy and we have to realise its OK not to be OK all of the time.

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YoU aRe NoT aLoNe.

Bee xoxo

Why University Boosted My Confidence

Why University Boosted My Confidence

Forever a home bird, I found moving out and going to University difficult. Despite people telling me about this incredible new chapter/ season/ adventure I was about to experience, I honestly wasn’t overly buzzed to go. Which sounds dreadful, because most people I speak to are so excited for University. That’s not to say I wasn’t looking forward to it entirely, I just wasn’t as ecstatic as my friends. To me, it just felt like I was leaving behind my family and my boyfriend and stepping completely out of my comfort zone. It forced me to do things independently and my confidence in myself grew.

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I became comfortable in my own company.

It’s funny how our minds embellish things, when I think back to my parents dropping me off at my halls of residence, I picture me stood in my room, surrounded by my stuff- simply wanting to cry. Which is actually super sad. I remember forcing myself to walk into the kitchen, introduce myself and make a cup of tea. I wasn’t to know, at that point, that my flat and I weren’t going to ‘click’ (What People Don’t Tell You About University). I think this is a general misconception. I honestly don’t know anyone who has got along with everyone in their flat. But I know pleeeenty of people who met friends on their course and through societies. Anyway, I ended up spending a lot of time on my own- and most of the time I liked it. I got into YouTube (a lot) and I started blogging. I skyped my boyfriend and family once a day too. I was comfortable in my own company. Though, I did find it hard to adapt to. Now the idea of being alone doesn’t intimidate me, but I know for sure that I prefer being with other people.

I could start a conversation with anyone.

I decided that as my flat and I didn’t ‘click’ I would make new friends. I mastered the art of walking up to people I barely knew and inviting them to coffee. Maybe I did come across loopy. But I felt lonely. I liked being on my own for short periods of time, but I needed to socialise. Otherwise I would have gone crazy. I had recently watched ‘We Bought A Zoo’ and one of the characters said that all you need is 10 seconds of courage. And that’s how I justified it. Because once I’d said ‘do you fancy going for a coffee?’ it was out there and I couldn’t take it back, no matter how silly I felt. I went on quite a few coffee trips, meals out and started being invited to social events outside my flat. So it worked and it boosted my confidence! One of the things that bothered me most was that I worried I was the problem. This proved that I wasn’t.

I realised I was OK.

That was one of the biggest, and most important lessons  University taught me. I had struggled at school and had quite low confidence. College was good for me in that sense, but I became far more confident at University. I ended up thinking that if I smiled, waved or spoke to someone and they didn’t do it back it was their problem, not mine. What’s the worst that could happen when you wave at someone and they don’t wave back? You look overly friendly? I mean over friendly has never offended me.

I was confident in my own decisions.

I didn’t particularly enjoy my Freshers, I had a rather unfortunate experience on my first Freshers event, and it really affected me. I felt quite uncomfortable on nights out and I realised pretty quickly I wasn’t going to be peer pressured into anything I didn’t want to do. This was something I felt really strongly about. I did, and still do, only go out if I have my ‘wingman’ (or woman!) with me. I’ve never felt entirely comfortable with clubbing, it’s just something I get quite anxious about- and my solution was surrounding myself in people I trust. People I know wouldn’t leave me alone in a club, feeling vulnerable. This confidence through making decisions for myself made me far more self confident. I socialised with who I wanted and when. Even now, I try really hard not to give into peer pressure.

 

University hasn’t been the easiest journey for me, but it taught me a lot about myself and what I want out of life. I would love to hear if you learnt any life lessons at University, had a bad experience or feel like an experience has shaped you as a person.

 

15 Reasons I Am Happy Today

15 Reasons I Am Happy Today

Recently, I have been in a bit of a funk.

There is so much to be said for being happy. I can complain as much as the next girl, but there is nothing better than being content. Sometimes I find it really hard to be positive and it can feel like things just go wrong- All. The. Time. With University strikes, my third and final year coming to an end and what feels like mountains of work- I’ve just been feeling a little bit naff. But like I said, this is just a funk. A temporary blip to look back on and think ‘thank goodness- I made it’.

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So today I wrote a list of 15 things that make me happy. Despite all the crappiness.

  1. Right now, I am sat at my desk, with a coffee. For which I am eternally grateful. It is the fuel in my engine and the source of my procaffeinating.
  2. My friends. I have just got back from a trip to Reading to see my cousin, Jess, and I realised just how much I love her. Friends end up being rocks without knowing it sometimes. My little group chat was buzzing away today, and I was reminded of how much I love our little conversations.
  3. Living so close to Leamington Spa Parade. I didn’t really consider Leamington Spa in my choosing of Warwick as my University of choice but it turns out it was a pretty good shout considering that its littered with coffee shops (literally every other shop). I am grateful for these coffee shops providing my flat-mate, Hannah, and I with the opportunity to escape from the flat and drink coffee (and inevitably window shop).
  4. I am loving eye liner at the moment. Feeling stressed can make me feel totally yuck. But I’ve found that putting on eyeliner every morning has really given me a boost. Essentially, I feel like crap, but at a glance, look somewhat put together!3
  5. My boyfriend. He’s pretty damn awesome and puts up with a lot. He buys me pasta, shares my love of skittles, and watches Netflix with me. I’m grateful we’re both going through University together. His constant motivation I find both baffling and inspiring.
  6. My dissertation is getting better. I’m writing it. I’m starting to see a light at the end of the tunnel.
  7. The lady in Costa who forever showers me in compliments and I don’t think she quite realises how much it cheers me up. I want to get her a little gift before I leave University for being such a gem. She does the same to my friend Hannah too. Maybe that contributes to my visiting Costa quite so often! 2
  8. Brunch. The invention of it. I love it. I love Bills. If it’s pancakes or something remotely avocado, I’m good with it.
  9. Floaty trousers. I’ve been feeling somewhat potato-like recently. A little bit circular-like, and sort of ugly. It’s probably the snacks and lack of movement from my desk. But floaty trousers have been a God-send. They make me feel less podgy and a little bit stylish!
  10. James Blunt. Recently, I’ve been listening to him (and Nina Simone) non-stop.
  11. Having said that Taylor Swift has made the car journeys with Hannah one hell of a throw back to my teenage years. Which I love. There is something fantastic about singing at the top of your lungs in the car with one of your best friends.4
  12. Colourful clothes. In these Dark Times (which I feel is a totally appropriately name for these Strike-ridden days/weeks/months) make me a lot chirpier. I feel more alive. Which sounds so dramatic.
  13. The weather. It’s much warmer since the snow melted (pfft surprising that!) and I like it. Sat on the train today, directly in the sun, made me desperately want to be on a beach holiday, with a pina colada in one hand and a crappy magazine in the other.
  14. Cornwall. I am off on a little adventure with my family (and my dogs) and I cannot wait. I’m excited to relax, play board games- and maybe even read a book!
  15. Netflix. Hannah and I have really got into all things murder mystery and CSI on Netflix recently- if you fancy something easy to watch and to cool down to in the evening I highly recommend the documentaries section on Netflix! We mostly natter and drink tea together, but I love it.
The Trump’s Tweets, #MeToo & International Women’s Day

The Trump’s Tweets, #MeToo & International Women’s Day

To support International Women’s Day, President Trump, Melania and Ivanka showed their support over social media.

I thought it would be pretty fitting to point out the hypocrisy of these tweets, and look at the bigger picture.

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Unfortunately, as the daughter and adviser of a President who has bragged about committing sexual assault and accused of sexual misconduct by over 18 people, Ivanka Trumps words ring pretty hollow.
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Twitter made sure to point out that Melania Trump’s husband undermined women on a daily basis, urging her to truly stand up for womens right instead of being #complicit.
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Trump previously claimed that he does not consider himself a ‘Feminist’, to Piers Morgan in an Interview, and that that ‘would be, maybe, going too far’. Which makes sense as Fat, Pig, Dog, Slob and Disgusting Animals are just a few of the terms used by Trump to describe women #charming.

Donald Trump has quite literally been accused of sexually assaulting and harassing women on several different occasions. This seems to be a recurring theme at the moment, a growing list of powerful men have faced serious consequences for sexual misconduct. But the most powerful one of all, has faced none. He simply claims these women are lying.

‘Things just seem to fall off Trump”- Jessica Leeds. 

But the #MeToo has become somewhat of a phenomenon, to provide a sort of umbrella of solidarity for millions of people to come forward with their stories of sexual misconduct. Following the ‘Me Too’ Movement spreading virally in October 2017, emerged the public revelations of sexual harassment allegations against Harvey Weinstein. The phrase, coined by Tarana Burke, and popularised by Alyssa Milano, encouraged women to tweet and give people a sense of magnitude of the problem’. These problems have been simmering away for years, decades, centuries. Whether it’s in the home, the workplace, with bosses or men using their power to take what they want from women. Boundaries were, and still are, being crossed. Boundaries that, apparently, are not clear in the first place. This is a revolution of silent breakers, gaining strength with every day and channelling collective anger to spur change.

#MeToo is not the first hashtag to become popular for sharing stories of sexual violence. Before, there was #MyHarveyWeinstein, #YouOkSis, #WhatWereYouWearing and #SurvivorPrivilege, to name a few. Tags such as these were to empower through empathy, especially young and vulnerable women.

The point is, tackling violence against women and girls is everyone’s business. As accurately put by Angelina Jolie, on the subject of sexual violence: ‘it is cheaper than a bullet, and it has lasting consequences that unfold with sickening predictability that make it so cruelly effective’. 

With International Women’s Day, I celebrated the women who came before us and the women who fight for equality today. I also celebrated the bravery of those who had the courage to speak out. To create the platform for every victim of sexual harassment to be counted.

Celebrations such as International Women’s Day and movements such as #MeToo have raised questions into the mainstream discourse about consent and what constitutes it; of the behaviour we deem acceptable, or not, with sexual context; of what we constitute as ‘normal’.

Each year this movement gathers momentum. Why? Because women are becoming more empowered than ever before.

P.S: for all those ‘but where is International Men’s Day?’ – it’s the 19th November!

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High Expectations: Perfectionist vs Optimist.

High Expectations: Perfectionist vs Optimist.

From a young age, the expectation to ‘be good’ is something we have drummed into us. But sometimes our expectations of ourselves are simply too high. We’re perfectionists.

Perfectionism: Perfectionism means setting our goals too high and having unrealistic expectations. Being allergic to failure is often driven by an underlying sense of shame. If we can achieve some lofty goal and be perfectly successful, then no one can shame us. Failure is often a prerequisite for success.

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Sometimes these high expectations of ourselves and want to ‘do good’ can stop us from getting properly stuck into life. I have learnt that there are times to ponder over decisions and there are times to just do it. 

If we let expectations rule our lives, we set ourselves up for disappointment.

I always feel so embarrassed when people ask me what I intend to do with my History Degree. As a Final Year Undergraduate, I really hoped I would know by now. I know what I want to do, in a generic sense- Marketing, HR or Advertising. But I’m not entirely set on anything. And I am not willing to make a decision, or even fib, just so that I don’t feel silly answering that question. Degrees are SO time consuming. I admire anyone who has something lined up after University, because the application processes are crazy long! But that’s the thing: I have time.

I’m itching to get a job, to have money and I want to travel and be one of those ‘free’ twenty-odd people I see all over social media. I was so set on having the above, and (for some peculiar reason) linked it with having a job lined up. But I have years to find the ‘perfect‘ job. And I will. My expectations, set by 18 year old me, of my 21 year old self, were too high. 

My favourite phrase recently has been ‘but we’re millennials’. My friend, Hannah, uses it all the time, and I kind of love it. I use it almost as an excuse! Us ‘millennials’ are pretty fortunate, we can have multiple jobs in a lifetime, we’re supposedly more self-assured and have a stronger sense of ‘civic responsibility’ and a healthy work-life balance. So, as a ‘millennial’ I want to focus on the now. I want to be my own kind of ‘good’.

(Note: having googled ‘millennials’, i am not one. How tragic. For the purposes of this blog post I will pretend I am. Though I am actually Generation Z. How naff does that sound? Lol.)

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I want to ‘be good’ in my own way. What does this mean? 

  • I will not be letting my own, or others, expectations of me rule my life. This is a vicious cycle, whereby I set myself up for disappointment. Then judge myself harshly for it.
  • I am going to try to think of life in terms of adventures and ditch my ‘expectations’ and instead set myself realistic ‘goals’.
  • I will be hopeful that I exceed these ‘goals’ and will happily make way for something bigger and better.
  • I plan to trust that everything will work itself out, it always does. I’ll just keep working away.
  • When things go ‘tits up’ I am going to try my darned-ist to remain positive. 

I want to enjoy the little things in life, and look back with achey cheeks and wrinkles from a lifetime of smiles and have zero regrets when reflecting bad on my good’ life.

 

 

Spots, Zits, Blips and Pimples: Home Remedies and Top Tips

Spots, Zits, Blips and Pimples: Home Remedies and Top Tips

Have you ever woken up with a throbbing sensation on your face,  wandered into the bathroom and discovered that Mount Vesuvius grew on your face over night? This is the plague of teenage years (and often years after- sorry girls!)

First things first- spots are normal! It’s natural to compare yourself to others, but make sure it’s to an attainable image. By this, I mean a lot of people, particularly celebrities, are airbrushed. Even then, there are apps that can help ‘normal’ people to airbrush themselves too.

I pulled together some celebrities that have suffered with their skin:

Miley Cyrus: someone who had to live her teenage years in the spotlight claimed that “I used to have really bad breakouts. My mom took me in to see a doctor and we sorted that out. But it made me really insecure.”

Lorde: she took to Twitter in 2014 to post an unedited picture of herself, that she contrasted with one that had been altered. She encouraged fans to embrace their imperfections. She even uploaded a picture of herself to show fans the acne cream she puts on before bed. Normal teen: The 17-year-old posted a photo of herself covered in skin cream, with the caption, 'In bed in Paris with my acne cream on', last month

Victoria Beckham: has apparently struggles with skin for years. Apparently she was even nicknamed ‘spotty spice’ by some haters. She found a dermatologist and used his products to clear up her skin.

The point is: everyone struggles with blemishes, especially in your teenage years. It’s all about finding something that works best for your skin and sticking to it!

Here are some Home Remedies for you to try out!

1) HONEY.honey.jpg

  • Thought one of the best home remedies by far. It’s an antibacterial, and it cleans and moisturises your skin. With this, it has a mild bleaching affect and prevents scarring.
  • Method: put a drop of honey on the spot, leave it for an hour and wash it off!

2) TOOTHPASTE. toothpaste

  • Any white toothpaste has anti-inflammatory qualities in it.
  • It can even be used as a scrub, when mixed with salt, to remove black heads and clean your face.
  • Oh and this is all Gigi Hadid uses soooo….
  • Methods: My all time go-to if I’m caught out. If I haven’t got my full blown skin care regime with me, then toothpaste it is! You apply it and leave it to dry. I often leave it over night, the minty fresh smell doesn’t bother me, and I find it generally works better.

3) ICE. (ICE BABY)

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  • An anti-inflammatory, it fights inflammation and prevents swelling and pus when used on time. This is a great method to use if you have an event or photos in a few hours time- it makes it that bit less obvious and a lot easier to cover up!
  • Method: hold/rub it on and around the spot.

4) BAKING SODA. baking-soa.jpg

  • If you fancy raiding your Mum’s baking cupboard, Baking Soda is surprisingly another anti-inflammatory. I use this (or toothpaste) over night.
  • Method: simply mix it with water and quickly apply it to the spot, and the area surrounding it. It sets quickly though, so watch out for that! To wash it off later, use luke warm water and it will fall off in flake.

5) STEAM.

  • This cleanses the pours and tightens the skin. It also feels great!
  • Method: once you’ve taken your makeup off, but before cleansing, steam your face. This can simply be that you’ve run hot water in the sink and you lean over it for a few minutes. It will mean that the cleansing etc following this will be super effective.

6) LEMON JUICE. lemon.jpg

  • The acids in lemons keeps the skin dry and clean. Another perk is that it’s full of vitamin C helps to tighten your skin and acts as an anti-aging agent.
  • Method: mix lemon juice and honey to keep your skin hydrated and the pimple dry. It also draws out the pus (woo!)

7) CUCUMBER. cucumber.jpg

  • Method: grating cucumber and putting it over the spot acts as an inflammatory.

8) GARLIC. garlic.jpg

  • Needs must! If you eat lots of garlic it can prevent pimples in the first place. But, as another anti-bacterial, it can also be placed directly on the spot.
  • Method: place it on the spot, for a few hours, or over night. To get rid of the garlic-y whiff you can simply rub some toothpaste over it.

Just remember people don’t remember when you had a spot- because people don’t do that! Even with Mount Vesuvius you are b-e-a-utiful!

Embrace those flaws! 

Bee xoxo

The Realities of Working Out

The Realities of Working Out

I am what I like to call: Fit(ish).

Fit(ish): semi-fit and a little bit podgy. Someone that likes the idea of being fit, but likes food too much.

I strive to be healthy. To me, this means two things. To be physically fitand active, and eat a healthy balanced diet. And mentally fit, whereby (to avoid mental breakdowns, and maintain sanity) I eat cake when and if I want it. I think it’s a pretty healthy diet. I would never want to resent being ‘healthy’ if it meant I couldn’t eat birthday cake, or have a takeaway every now and then. I’m a firm believer in treatin’ yo self. 

But that’s enough natter, here are some of the realities I have found with working out!

CARDIO:

Getting bored after 5 minutes of any form of cardio. I have always hated running. I simply don’t enjoy it. But I do try. (I’m far better at running out of money, if I’m honest)will.gif

Running next to someone and it feeling like a race. They up the speed, so do I. Bring it. run.gif

My running style: drunk woman slowly being chased by absolutely nothing.drunk.gif

When you take your headphones out and realise you were making panting/grunting noiseswhile you did cardio.sponge.gif

When people look at you while you do cardio.melissa

When you up the speed too much and your heart skips a beat, because you can’t keep up.gym.gif

Me doing cardio: ’20 minutes left. That’s two lots of 10.  It’s only 4 lots of 5 minutes’(then I congratulate myself on the 30 seconds wasted on that mental maths session)wil.gif

I like to think, when people see me jogging outside, they think ‘wow an athlete’, but in reality it’s ‘aw, good for her’.

Quite frankly, the best bit about running is the end.

I’ve honestly come to the conclusion that running is wrong. I agree with Miranda Hart,unless it’s running professionally, or as a child- it’s not OK.

SWIMMING: 

Is this just me? As a kid, at swimming lessons, I would convince myself there was a shark in the pool– so I would swim faster. Maybe I should imagine clowns on the treadmill behind me.shark.gif

MOTTO’S I THINK IN THE GYM/LIFE:

‘Sweat is just my fat crying’.

‘I may look like a potato now, but one day I’ll turn into fries and you’ll all want me then.’

‘I work out because I know I would have been the first to die in the Hunger Games.’

‘I wear all black in the gym, like a funeral for my fat.’

REGRETS: 

When your ‘cheat meal’ turns into a cheat week.shame.gif

Stepping on the scales and seeing no change after weeks of exercise: ‘off to Krispy Kreme I go’.donunt.gif

Leaving the gym feeling great, waking up the next morning feeling like your legs are hungover.
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FIBS:

Aim:to be the weight I told the app I was.

‘Drink more water’ they said, ‘it will be good for you’ they said. I’m weeing ALL THE TIME.

(Last time I did that 2 litre a day thing, my Mum sent me to the Doctors thinking I had diabetes.)

My summer body expectations vs reality. summer.png

Embracing your summer body like at least my flipflops still fit!fat b 2.gif

So there it is, a page full of GIF’s, personal experiences and life contemplations, from a Fit(ish) individual with some serious love for cake. 

Hairstyle Hacks Every Girl Should Know

Hairstyle Hacks Every Girl Should Know

If you’re anything like me, sometimes (daily) you run late.  Whether you snooze the alarm one time too many or mess up your winged eyeliner, something always happens to make you have a last-minute panic. Though I love the idea of simply being fashionably late, I know that really my lack of punctuality soon becomes unfashionably annoying.

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During this getting ready frenzy, my hair usually falls to the bottom of my ‘to-do’ list. And, let’s be honest, having your hair ‘did good’ makes you feel ready to take on whatever the day may have in store for you! You can channel the g l a m. So I put together some tips I have learnt over the years to make getting out the door (with your hair intact!) that little bit easier.

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Here you go!

Spray your bobby pins with hairspray.

  • This way they stay in place all day!

 Spray your toothbrush with hairspray to tame baby hairs.

  • I have always had baby hair at the front of my head… and they can really wind me up. As a child they would curl up and out, sort of like horns. I saw this hack online, tested the theory and it worked! So yay, bye horns, I win.

Put your hair in a high pony tail, then curl it. 

  • I have this theory that if you wake up feeling even remotely crappy, you should spend that extra 5 minutes on yourself. Then, if it’s a reflection or a mirror in the bathroom, at a glance you look in control (even if you don’t feel it!). For some reason, having my hair put together, and giving others the idea that this girl has extra time to do her hair in the morning gives me great comfort. Nobody need know about the bed hair frenzy!meryl.gif
  • Anyway, I digress! It’s really quick to spruce up your hair by tying it into a high pony and curling it. This way, you look fabby and it’s taken you no more that 5 minutes!

Spray hairspray on your hand for a softer look.

  • I can sometimes go a little overboard on the hairspray, and then you have the crunchy, tacky feel to your hair. And nobody wants that! So if you spray it onto your hands, you can give your hair that little bit more volume. This gives a more natural curls look and saves you the wasted hairspray.

Blow dry your hair with cool air after blow drying it.

  • Blow drying my hair can take me aaaages, and there is nothing more frustrating than styling my hair and five minutes later looking like I’ve had a run in with a rabid squirrel. So blowing cool air prevents your hair from going frizzy and sets the style.
  • It’s kind of like washing your face with warm water, followed by cool!

Put mousse in your dry hair, then blow dry it. 

  • If you’re having one of those volume-less, non-co-operative hair days- then this hack is perfect. By adding mousse to dry hair, then blow drying it, you add the volume you were lacking!
  • I personally find volume-less hair the hardest to work with.

Use talc powder instead of dry shampoo. 

  • For those desperate times. I can most definitely say for blonds (brunettes- maybe try this out first!) this works wonders. It acts as a dry shampoo really nicely.

Put dry shampoo in the minute you wake up.3a2406db-6630-4d77-bd19-d909bc9919a3

  • Dry shampoo, my companion on lazy days, or those mornings when my hair is limp, volume-less and greasy! I try so hard not to wash my hair every day, it’s really not a great habit to get into- but greasy hair just makes me feel g r o s sSoooo dry shampoo is a God send. But a top tip is to put it on the minute you wake up as it takes a while to soak up the oils.
  • I always apply it before I do my makeup.

Put dry shampoo in before bed.

  • If it’s day 2 (or 3 or 4!) of not washing your hair, and you know it’s going to be looking a lil bit greasy in the morning, put some dry shampoo in before bed. This really works, not only do I wake up and think ‘huh, that’s not too bad’, it also makes it easier to style!

Only wash the front section of your hair.

  • Ladies, this is when your hair just ain’t cooperating. Whether you slept on it funny, it rained or you just need to feel f r e s h- wash the front section. It may seem odd, but it works. It’s easier to style and doesn’t take anywhere near as long as washing the lot!

Have a ‘go-to’ hairstyle: mine is the low pony tail.

  • My go-to hairstyle is a low pony. Not only does it look slick, it means nobody can see the mess we call greasy hair!
  • I mean, you can go crazy: low ponytail, low bun, french plait… the skies the limitown it

I hope these hacks help you spruce up your hair on those running late, greasy lookin’ (probably Monday) days!

Bee xoxo

Oh and here is a GIF of a dog who, much like me, hates blow drying his hair!

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Wardrobe Malfunctions That Tick Girls Off, Part 2

Wardrobe Malfunctions That Tick Girls Off, Part 2

OK, so there are a looot of things that frustrate me about clothes of today, varying from flashing your knickers on a windy day to having a claustrophobic meltdown after getting stuck in a top in the changing rooms. Here is another list of 10 Wardrobe Malfunctions That Tick Girls Off.

  1. VPL. Ain’t nobody got time for that. Leotards are the worst for this! You don’t want a dented looking booty, and even the ‘invisible pants’ are telling porkies #girlproblems pants.gif
  2. Windy days + skirts = a knicker flash. I would love to say I’m slick enough to be all Marilyn Monroe about this- but no. skirt.gif
  3. Maxi dresses… being too maxi. I’m not even that small! I’m 5ft 3. Granted I’m not massive, but the Maxi dresses shouldn’t be a trip hazard. trip.gif
  4. Phones not fitting in pockets. This one I feel bad even putting in, because it’s super first world problems! I have an iPhone 7 Plus (pretty much an iPad) and it doesn’t fit in any pockets, it’s just another thing to remember to pick up. phone
  5. The Changing Room Panic. This has happened to me on numerous occasions and as a result I rarely go shopping alone. I genuinely think I developed claustrophobia specifically with regards to changing rooms. The panic of putting a top on and NOT BEING ABLE TO GET OUT. You do a sort of jumpy wiggle in desperation. Arms in the air, breathing in as much as you can and preparing yourself to walk out of the changing room to ask for help. Mortifying. Please tell me I’m not the only one?cat.gif
  6. Gym leggings falling down. To clarify, my leggings aren’t baggy, this is not because I am skinny. It’s to do with the design. Fellow gym-goers are more likely to think ‘what the heck is that girl doing on the treadmill?’ as I run while holding my trousers up, in fear of mooning someone behind me. A bit like a waddling duck.duck.gif
  7. Tops with make-up on in shops. This really aggravates me. I have a little hack for people who wear makeup and want to try clothes on. And it may sound silly, but I swear it works! Pull all your hair over your face + put the top on = no makeup mark! I always get super sad when I see a top I like but it’s smothered in a brownish nose mark around the neck. clothes
  8. 3/4 length trousers looking like ‘ankle bangers’. I love me some floaty trousers. But sometimes they can look totally ridiculous! Like I say, I’m 5 ft 3 and some trousers are simply too long, I got some 3/4 length trousers, but they’re an awkward length. There is literally an inch between my shoes and my trousers. It’s a dodge look.
  9. Flared sleeves. Flared sleeves are my favourite thing at the moment. But there is no denying that they get in the way. Washing up is a nightmare, eating dinner is beyond messy and putting a coat on makes the sleeves ruffle up to your shoulders so you look like a sumo wrestler.
  10. Socks slipping off in your shoes. The most uncomfortable feeling. Plus you have to take your shoes off in public to retrieve the escapee sock.