Why University Boosted My Confidence

Why University Boosted My Confidence

Forever a home bird, I found moving out and going to University difficult. Despite people telling me about this incredible new chapter/ season/ adventure I was about to experience, I honestly wasn’t overly buzzed to go. Which sounds dreadful, because most people I speak to are so excited for University. That’s not to say I wasn’t looking forward to it entirely, I just wasn’t as ecstatic as my friends. To me, it just felt like I was leaving behind my family and my boyfriend and stepping completely out of my comfort zone. It forced me to do things independently and my confidence in myself grew.

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I became comfortable in my own company.

It’s funny how our minds embellish things, when I think back to my parents dropping me off at my halls of residence, I picture me stood in my room, surrounded by my stuff- simply wanting to cry. Which is actually super sad. I remember forcing myself to walk into the kitchen, introduce myself and make a cup of tea. I wasn’t to know, at that point, that my flat and I weren’t going to ‘click’ (What People Don’t Tell You About University). I think this is a general misconception. I honestly don’t know anyone who has got along with everyone in their flat. But I know pleeeenty of people who met friends on their course and through societies. Anyway, I ended up spending a lot of time on my own- and most of the time I liked it. I got into YouTube (a lot) and I started blogging. I skyped my boyfriend and family once a day too. I was comfortable in my own company. Though, I did find it hard to adapt to. Now the idea of being alone doesn’t intimidate me, but I know for sure that I prefer being with other people.

I could start a conversation with anyone.

I decided that as my flat and I didn’t ‘click’ I would make new friends. I mastered the art of walking up to people I barely knew and inviting them to coffee. Maybe I did come across loopy. But I felt lonely. I liked being on my own for short periods of time, but I needed to socialise. Otherwise I would have gone crazy. I had recently watched ‘We Bought A Zoo’ and one of the characters said that all you need is 10 seconds of courage. And that’s how I justified it. Because once I’d said ‘do you fancy going for a coffee?’ it was out there and I couldn’t take it back, no matter how silly I felt. I went on quite a few coffee trips, meals out and started being invited to social events outside my flat. So it worked and it boosted my confidence! One of the things that bothered me most was that I worried I was the problem. This proved that I wasn’t.

I realised I was OK.

That was one of the biggest, and most important lessons  University taught me. I had struggled at school and had quite low confidence. College was good for me in that sense, but I became far more confident at University. I ended up thinking that if I smiled, waved or spoke to someone and they didn’t do it back it was their problem, not mine. What’s the worst that could happen when you wave at someone and they don’t wave back? You look overly friendly? I mean over friendly has never offended me.

I was confident in my own decisions.

I didn’t particularly enjoy my Freshers, I had a rather unfortunate experience on my first Freshers event, and it really affected me. I felt quite uncomfortable on nights out and I realised pretty quickly I wasn’t going to be peer pressured into anything I didn’t want to do. This was something I felt really strongly about. I did, and still do, only go out if I have my ‘wingman’ (or woman!) with me. I’ve never felt entirely comfortable with clubbing, it’s just something I get quite anxious about- and my solution was surrounding myself in people I trust. People I know wouldn’t leave me alone in a club, feeling vulnerable. This confidence through making decisions for myself made me far more self confident. I socialised with who I wanted and when. Even now, I try really hard not to give into peer pressure.

 

University hasn’t been the easiest journey for me, but it taught me a lot about myself and what I want out of life. I would love to hear if you learnt any life lessons at University, had a bad experience or feel like an experience has shaped you as a person.

 

High Expectations: Perfectionist vs Optimist.

High Expectations: Perfectionist vs Optimist.

From a young age, the expectation to ‘be good’ is something we have drummed into us. But sometimes our expectations of ourselves are simply too high. We’re perfectionists.

Perfectionism: Perfectionism means setting our goals too high and having unrealistic expectations. Being allergic to failure is often driven by an underlying sense of shame. If we can achieve some lofty goal and be perfectly successful, then no one can shame us. Failure is often a prerequisite for success.

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Sometimes these high expectations of ourselves and want to ‘do good’ can stop us from getting properly stuck into life. I have learnt that there are times to ponder over decisions and there are times to just do it. 

If we let expectations rule our lives, we set ourselves up for disappointment.

I always feel so embarrassed when people ask me what I intend to do with my History Degree. As a Final Year Undergraduate, I really hoped I would know by now. I know what I want to do, in a generic sense- Marketing, HR or Advertising. But I’m not entirely set on anything. And I am not willing to make a decision, or even fib, just so that I don’t feel silly answering that question. Degrees are SO time consuming. I admire anyone who has something lined up after University, because the application processes are crazy long! But that’s the thing: I have time.

I’m itching to get a job, to have money and I want to travel and be one of those ‘free’ twenty-odd people I see all over social media. I was so set on having the above, and (for some peculiar reason) linked it with having a job lined up. But I have years to find the ‘perfect‘ job. And I will. My expectations, set by 18 year old me, of my 21 year old self, were too high. 

My favourite phrase recently has been ‘but we’re millennials’. My friend, Hannah, uses it all the time, and I kind of love it. I use it almost as an excuse! Us ‘millennials’ are pretty fortunate, we can have multiple jobs in a lifetime, we’re supposedly more self-assured and have a stronger sense of ‘civic responsibility’ and a healthy work-life balance. So, as a ‘millennial’ I want to focus on the now. I want to be my own kind of ‘good’.

(Note: having googled ‘millennials’, i am not one. How tragic. For the purposes of this blog post I will pretend I am. Though I am actually Generation Z. How naff does that sound? Lol.)

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I want to ‘be good’ in my own way. What does this mean? 

  • I will not be letting my own, or others, expectations of me rule my life. This is a vicious cycle, whereby I set myself up for disappointment. Then judge myself harshly for it.
  • I am going to try to think of life in terms of adventures and ditch my ‘expectations’ and instead set myself realistic ‘goals’.
  • I will be hopeful that I exceed these ‘goals’ and will happily make way for something bigger and better.
  • I plan to trust that everything will work itself out, it always does. I’ll just keep working away.
  • When things go ‘tits up’ I am going to try my darned-ist to remain positive. 

I want to enjoy the little things in life, and look back with achey cheeks and wrinkles from a lifetime of smiles and have zero regrets when reflecting bad on my good’ life.

 

 

The Realities of Working Out

The Realities of Working Out

I am what I like to call: Fit(ish).

Fit(ish): semi-fit and a little bit podgy. Someone that likes the idea of being fit, but likes food too much.

I strive to be healthy. To me, this means two things. To be physically fitand active, and eat a healthy balanced diet. And mentally fit, whereby (to avoid mental breakdowns, and maintain sanity) I eat cake when and if I want it. I think it’s a pretty healthy diet. I would never want to resent being ‘healthy’ if it meant I couldn’t eat birthday cake, or have a takeaway every now and then. I’m a firm believer in treatin’ yo self. 

But that’s enough natter, here are some of the realities I have found with working out!

CARDIO:

Getting bored after 5 minutes of any form of cardio. I have always hated running. I simply don’t enjoy it. But I do try. (I’m far better at running out of money, if I’m honest)will.gif

Running next to someone and it feeling like a race. They up the speed, so do I. Bring it. run.gif

My running style: drunk woman slowly being chased by absolutely nothing.drunk.gif

When you take your headphones out and realise you were making panting/grunting noiseswhile you did cardio.sponge.gif

When people look at you while you do cardio.melissa

When you up the speed too much and your heart skips a beat, because you can’t keep up.gym.gif

Me doing cardio: ’20 minutes left. That’s two lots of 10.  It’s only 4 lots of 5 minutes’(then I congratulate myself on the 30 seconds wasted on that mental maths session)wil.gif

I like to think, when people see me jogging outside, they think ‘wow an athlete’, but in reality it’s ‘aw, good for her’.

Quite frankly, the best bit about running is the end.

I’ve honestly come to the conclusion that running is wrong. I agree with Miranda Hart,unless it’s running professionally, or as a child- it’s not OK.

SWIMMING: 

Is this just me? As a kid, at swimming lessons, I would convince myself there was a shark in the pool– so I would swim faster. Maybe I should imagine clowns on the treadmill behind me.shark.gif

MOTTO’S I THINK IN THE GYM/LIFE:

‘Sweat is just my fat crying’.

‘I may look like a potato now, but one day I’ll turn into fries and you’ll all want me then.’

‘I work out because I know I would have been the first to die in the Hunger Games.’

‘I wear all black in the gym, like a funeral for my fat.’

REGRETS: 

When your ‘cheat meal’ turns into a cheat week.shame.gif

Stepping on the scales and seeing no change after weeks of exercise: ‘off to Krispy Kreme I go’.donunt.gif

Leaving the gym feeling great, waking up the next morning feeling like your legs are hungover.
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FIBS:

Aim:to be the weight I told the app I was.

‘Drink more water’ they said, ‘it will be good for you’ they said. I’m weeing ALL THE TIME.

(Last time I did that 2 litre a day thing, my Mum sent me to the Doctors thinking I had diabetes.)

My summer body expectations vs reality. summer.png

Embracing your summer body like at least my flipflops still fit!fat b 2.gif

So there it is, a page full of GIF’s, personal experiences and life contemplations, from a Fit(ish) individual with some serious love for cake. 

Wardrobe Malfunctions That Tick Girls Off

Wardrobe Malfunctions That Tick Girls Off

You know when you have a leotard wedgie or stick your thumb through your tights? Thats what this blog is about. All the irritating things clothes can do that make you want to walk around naked!

  1. Trying to  avoid your clothes touching the toilet floor. Bane. Of. My. Life. London is one of my favourite places to travel, but OMG never again shall I wear a jumpsuit while exploring the capital. Sat on the loo, holding your trouser legs up and thinking ‘why is the floor sticky’ is never fun. floor.gif
  2. Being able to fit into an 8 in one shop, and just about squeezing into a 14 in another... how?! What measurements do you use?! clothes
  3. The Leotard Wedgie. Put your hands in the air (like you just don’t care- forever an S Club 7 gal!) and ain’t no top untucking itself. Buuuut, you have a mighty wedgie all day. A compromise? I think not. wedgie
  4. Hat hair. I try to pull of the cute hat look, but always end up with fluffy/ static/ sweaty hair and a silly looking makeup line. hat hair.gif
  5. I love me some Sequins, but can we appreciate the torture of wearing them sometimes? Plus the fact they can’t be washed and fall off everywhere. Scratchy little things. sequins
  6. Sticking your thumb through your tights. Give me strength. This is enough to ruin my mood all day. I even try and pack a second pair now, just in case! tight.gif
  7. When your ripped jeans… rip too much. OK I know this is a mega first world problem and I can hear every over-forty year-old in the country asking me ‘why did you buy ripped jeans then?’. Because they’re cool. OK. They’re not cool, however, when your knee is hanging out of the overly big hole that you busted bending over. Oh and another thing: I get chilly knees!jeans
  8. Side Zips. Pure evil. I genuinely feel like I’m from a scene from Jaws whenever I do up a side zip. The worst is a side zip under your arm. You have the frustration of trying to get the right angle without popping a shoulder. Then the panic that it could nip my skin at any moment. And I’ll be stuck. Forever. *cue dramatic music*jaws.gif
  9. When your little toe pops out of your tights. Makes me cringe even thinking about it. (Makes me cringe using the word cringe) Eugh the horribly cold sensation as the rebel toe escapes. Never sure if it’s cold or a lack of blood supply from the tight-tights. drama.gif
  10. Someone stepping on the back of your flip-flop. This aggravates me immensely. It goes one of two ways: it breaks the toggle-bit between your toes. Or, it shoots forward in an attempt at freedom and you have to hop after it, humiliated. anger.gif

Girl Struggles are one of my favourite things to write about. I think it’s because I’m a little bit dopey sometimes, and have experienced the majority of ‘Girl Struggles’ imaginable.

Hope you enjoyed reading this and maybe you even thought ‘same!’ (I hope someone did!) ,

Bee xoxo

Things I think in the Gym

Things I think in the Gym

  1. Forgot my earphones. Again.
  2. Every girl in Leamington is in this gym tonight. Crikey.
  3. It stinks.
  4. Why are there never any treadmills?! Bike it is.
  5. Why do gyms place random mirrors around? It’s actually so off putting watching myself cycle. Like, is that what I look like?!
  6. How have I only been on this machine for 12 minutes and 34 seconds?!
  7. Wow she looks pretty glam for the gym. I look like a potato.
  8. Ooh KUWTK is on!
  9. Now I feel even more like a potato.
  10. I am going to channel this potato-ness.
  11. I cannot wait for my Deliveroo later, eek!
  12. This has been on my mind all day. During my seminar this morning, my stomach rumbled and sounded like a fart. But I swear it wasn’t.
  13. A girl just hopped on the bike next to me and it feels like a passive aggressive race. It’s on.
  14. Oop, just made eye contact, now it’s just uncomfortable.
  15. The news is so depressing.
  16. I probably don’t need to eat deliveroo and cake… but I shall!
  17. What if everyone thought it was a fart?
  18. Oh my gosh, the word fart comes with this emoji: 💨
  19. This has me in stitches. I look like even more of a loon chuckling away to myself in the gym.
  20. I want to go on a mat but they’re all taken.
  21. The news just showed those creepy ass robots- do they freak anyone else out?!
  22. I’ve never looked at the ceiling in the gym before.
  23. Hey! Someone has just left their water bottle on the matt  while they go on another machine. Not the rules of the gym gal. Nu-uh.
  24. Guess my legs are going to be super worked out after this!
  25. I can’t feel my butt.
  26. I wonder if I can move the water bottle.
  27. Nope, I’m not bad ass enough and confrontation makes me clammy.
  28. The news reporter looks like a young version of Will Smith.
  29. Yay, I got a mat! Had to sprint to get it, but looking eager in the gym isn’t the worst thing in the world!
  30. Never know where to look when I do hand weights. Like, I don’t want to look at myself in the mirror, because people might think I’m thinking ‘phwoar’ which certainly isn’t the case.
  31. Looking at your arms while you do weights is impossible.
  32. I found a nail in the wall. That’s where I’m looking.
  33. Just had a panic, thought my trousers split. How embarrassing would that be?!
  34. Doooooone.
  35. I need food in my belly.
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Here is a super blurry picture of me blowing out my candles following this gym session. Yes I did eat the cake!

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Student Stereotypes

Student Stereotypes

University exposes you to all kinds of wonderful variations of student. But as a prospectus student its hard to know what stereotypes to believe.

Here is a list of Student Stereotypes that I’ve put together to give an insight into the realities of student life.

Type Number 1: THE CAFFEINE ADDICTcoffee shops on campus are always (funnily enough) buzzing. This type of student is the one you can’t picture without a take away coffee cup in their hand. I’ve often wondered how these people sleep at night. You can tell when the deadlines taking it’s toll on a person/ it’s victim when their desk is scattered with energy drinks. Warning: a caffeine addiction can be an expensive affair, so if you feel you may be vulnerable- by a flask in advance!

george of the jungle

Type Number 2: THE LAST MINUTE ONE- we’ve all been there. Where we have underestimated the time it would take to tweak a few words and write a bibliography, and ultimately stayed up all night fixing it. But it’s when you do it EVERY TIME that you become the ‘last minute student’. This is probably quite a stress free student life 80% of the time, the other 20% however is pure hell. Usually worst around the time the mammoth end of term deadline rears its ugly head. You find this breed of student hunched in a corner of the silent floor in the library, surrounded by energy drinks (maybe a caffeine addict too?) giving off vibes of intense anxiety.

Nothings going in

Type Number 3: THE ONE WITH THE GAP YEAR MEMORIES sometimes the stories are awesome, sometimes they’re obviously made up… But they’re usually the ones with stories full of life lessons. I think a little part of me will always wish I had a gap year. Having said that, it never appealed to me at all before University, but there really are so few times in your life that travel is so easy!

Type Number 4: THE PARTY ANIMAL- AKA not me. I am more of a chatting-in-a-coffee-shop kind of gal. But probably the biggest student stereotype is the party animal. The one who will drink til dawn, loves all kinds of events, whether they’re clubs, pubs or student run events. There is no denying that being the party animal will lead to super memories, and so will befriending one!

Party

Type Number 5: THE FORGETFUL ONE- yep, that’s me. Along with the majority of students! I will highlight there is a difference between forgetting your keys (such as I) and then forgetting deadlines (totally not me, even the idea terrifies me).

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Type Number 6: THE SLEEPER. Granted, the ability to take naps has been perfected by myself over the last 2 years. I find a 20 minute nap is just enough to recharge my batteries, but not long enough to make me shattered. However, I am not a sleeper. A sleeper is the student that uses the desk in lectures to catch some z’s and usually the one who openly states that they can’t do something because they ‘need a nap’. University is tiring stuff. But this type of student is a total pain in the butt to do a group project with!

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Type Number 7: THE LOUD ONE- the one who comes in late and announces it to the flat, or chatters away mid lecture or even worse- blares their music in Halls of Residence. Tip: usually it just takes a knock on the door and they’ll turn the music down, or a sharp ‘shh’ in the hallway at 3 am. Writing this, I am aware of how boring I sound!

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Type Number 8: THE TYPICAL STUDENTlies in, leaves washing up for a week, takes all washing home, plays their music too loud and occasionally forgets their notes for University. This is the majority of people.

So, what breed of student am I?

Type Number 2: the forgetful one: I lose thing continually and forget things a lot. But luckily, not the most important things (so far!)

Type Number 3: the caffeine addict: ONLY around exams. But boy does it get bad.

Type Number 8: the typical student: does it count if I turned a wash pink with a red sock?

Type Number 7: the sleeper: I am the Queen of Naps.

#FirstWorldProblems

#FirstWorldProblems

Hello everybody!

I find reading about other peoples problems and thinking yay, I’m not the only one who does that’ is oddly reassuring in life! So today’s blog is all about the awkward moments in life.

I think I should point out these are all ‘First-World Problems’. If you didn’t know what that means, it is a slang word for issues that take place in a First World nation. The sort of issues that are complained about only because of the absence of more pressing concerns.

AKA these are trivial things.

Here we go:

  1. Holding the door for people– at what point do you stop holding it? How long do you wait if you’ve made eye contact with the next person? I mean, nearly every time I get mugged off, I end up standing for ages, awkwardly, waiting for people to stop coming through a doorway. Why is something so simple made so complex?! door
  2. What’s worse sitting on a warm toilet seat or a cold one? The anticipation and mental preparation to sit on a freezing cold toilet seat is never enjoyable. However, the warm toilet seat is deeply disturbing.toilet seat
  3. Standing in the shower, wet, and realising you don’t have shampoo– story of my life. The amount of times I’ve had to dart out, grab a towel and sprint to my room leaving a trail of water behind me. Pure dopiness.
  4. The phone rings every time I’m in the loo– and half the time it’s a cold caller. So I automatically regret hurling myself down the stairs to be greeted by dodgey connection and discovering I had a car accident (one I can’t remember apparently).
  5. Brushing your teeth, then realising you haven’t drunk your drink– anything citrus-y is the worst for this. It tastes so vile. But you have that overwhelming urge not to waste it.
  6. Putting the wrong milk in my tea– I do this with soya milk all the time. It’s a proper mood killer. It separates and looks like off milk. But darker. It’s not an enjoyable experience. soya tea
  7. Standing in the rain, yanking the door handle of the car, to realise you haven’t unlocked it– this is pretty much a daily occurrence for me.
  8. When someone finishes the nutella or peanut butter, but you can’t tell from the outside– pure evil. The amount of times this has happened to me.
  9. Staring at the laptop, phone or tablets screen for too long and developing a head ache– this is actually a genuine University issue, most of my resources are online. Even my books are online, and I do a History Degree, so I read a shed tone of them. I really do wonder what my eye sight will be like at 60, because even now it ain’t great.
  10. Getting in bed and realising the light switch is out of reach– which basically means I have to leave the warmth of my bed very begrudgingly.
  11. Stepping on an upturned plug socket– there are no words. plug
  12. Opening a bag of crisps and thinking how stingy the crisp companies have become– it saddens me deeply. The excitement of having a packet of crisps to open it and find 10 in there.
  13. Closing tabs you didn’t mean to– angers me so much. I think it could possibly put me in a bad mood for over an hour. And I’m fully aware it’s a first world problem. tabs2
  14. Dropping a biscuit in my drink– yes, I am a biscuit-dunker, no I have no shame. Except for that yucky bit at the bottom of the drink where the lost biscuits lie. tea dunker
  15. Not wanting to wear jeans because they’re expensive and they’re ripping– student problem? I hope it is. I can’t be dealing with this forever. I have thick thighs, which basically means I go through jeans super quick. So my wardrobe revolves around the status of my jeans. mermaid
  16. Overly fizzy coke (or champagne!) that spills over the top– then you’re faced with another problem (besides spilt beverages)… do you rush to sip the overflow up like a panic stricken alcoholic (lets be real I was talking about champagne)? Or do you pretend you’re actually a lady? A mental struggle i have.
  17. Auto-rotate on my phone- never rotates when I want it to, rotates when I don’t want it to. I can’t win and end up shaking my phone as if its a maraca. autorotate
  18. Getting too excited for food… and burning your mouth- again, I just get super moody when this happens. trump
  19. My dog has a drink, leaves a trail of water and I step in it– wet socks is one of my least favourite feelings in life.
  20. My Laptop restarting itself without asking– this really ticks me off. It’s always at the most inconvenient of times. I end up repeating ‘no’ at my laptop, getting higher and louder with each ‘no’ until it defies me and I have to sit and watch it restart for what feels like a lifetime.

Let me know in the comments whether these issues are ones you experience too!

Bee xoxo

Time Management and Positive Mindset Tips

Time Management and Positive Mindset Tips

‘I am not an early bird or a night owl. I am some form of permanently exhausted pigeon’

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Being one step ahead is undeniably a wonderful feeling, but at what cost? I have learnt that at University, it is just as important to be OK, happy and on track. I used to put a lot of effort into being prepared for the week before it had even started, but sometimes you have to admit, being ahead of the game is hard work, and actually not necessary. So here are a few ways that I manage my time and maintain a healthy mindset when going into each new week.

How do you manage your time?

‘time is non-refundable. use it with intention.’

Time management is so central to any degree and maintaining a healthy mindset. I love the phrase ‘work smarter, not harder’ and it’s something I really try to live by. Here are a few ways I manage my time to work smarter.

  • Complete my most important tasks first– if it has to be done, it’s top of the list.
  • Don’t over-commit– I take on enough. Why give yourself an unrealistic target? It’s not worth having mountains of things to do, but never finishing them to a standard you are proud of.
  • Have a good night sleep- boring but true. 7 to 8 hours is best to be productive the next day.
  • Work at your optimum time– I find I work best in the afternoon and when I get the motivation, I grasp it with both hands! Some people work best in the morning. Find out what works for you and plan your time accordingly.
  • Don’t procrastinate– as the Queen of Procrastination I can say this is a tough one. So I usually put my phone far away from my bed. Or even on a high up shelf, which sounds ridiculous, but my lazy butt won’t be able to justify reaching up to get it off of the shelf when I know I should be doing something else.
  • Give your tasks a time limit– it’s tough but more time efficient. For example, I can have hundreds of pages to read for pre-reading, but if I have a lot of other tasks needing to be completed, then I will allocate myself 2 hours
  • Leave a buffer time between tasks– I usually add 30% of the time I expected the task to take. This way if you run over, it’s OK and you have factored it in.
  • Think of each task as an individual one- looking at a long list of ‘to-do’s’ is enough to stress anyone out. So plan what you need to do to complete your tasks and focus on only one at a time. I even get rid of all my other tabs, so I can fully focus on the task at hand.
  • Exercise and eat healthily- I am a lover of chocolate and an advocate of treating yourself when the going gets tough. But, eating a healthy, balanced diet is key. Plus the gym is a great outlet.
  • Make weekends actual breaks– granted we all have work that runs into the weekend, but take some time off for yourself.
  • Create an organised system that works for you– I like to print of a calendar at the beginning of term and fill in all my deadlines and social events I would like to attend. Seeing it in this format makes everything look a lot less daunting.

‘the key is not to prioritise what’s on your schedule but to schedule your priorities’

How do you maintain your mental health?

Maintaining a healthy can be hard, especially when you have deadlines coming out your ears- so here are a few way’s that I rationalise my ‘to-do’s’ and maintain a healthy mindset.

  • Keep perspective- everyone has those days where things just go wrong. But tomorrow is a new day. A new start.
  • I write a list or a mindmap of everything on my mind, right before bed. It’s quite therapeutic, I pour out all my worries, concerns and to-do’s and go to bed with the knowledge I’ll pick up where I left off in the morning. You can even have a chuckle with yourself when you think ‘future me can deal with that’.
  • Value yourself- a friend said to me that you should be your own best friend. Like the phrase ‘treat others the way you would like to be treated’ but in reverse. Treat yourself the way you treat others. Value yourself and avoid self-criticism. Make time for hobbies and the things you enjoy the most.
  • Do not compare yourself to others– you’re doing your best and that’s all that matters.
  • Take care of your body- eat a healthy diet, treat yourself occasionally, drink lots of water and avoid the consumption of things that aren’t going to benefit your body, such as cigarettes.
  • Find something that makes you happy. For me it’s chocolate. Some may say comfort eating is bad, but when you’ve got deadlines and need a boost, or even have had a bad day… treat yo self.
  • Surround yourself with good people- positive vibes are so important to maintaining a healthy mindset. People generally feel better with a bigger support network.
  • Control the controllables. Change what you can and don’t worry about the rest.

    ‘surround yourself with people who see your value and remind you of it’

Defining Moments

Defining Moments

This blog post was inspired by Natalie Leanne’s Blog Post that I read on the train journey home the other day. I’m super nosy and love learning more about people. Natalie’s Blog is so open and just so relatable- I highly recommend checking her blog out (natalieleanne.com).

On that note, I am going to share some of my defining moments in life and hope that others can relate!

Defining Moment Number 1: University. Seems pretty straight forward, but actually this was a defining moment for me in a way I totally didn’t anticipate. My first year of university I found really tough, and I know I’m not alone in this. I just felt so alone. I missed home, my family, my friends and my boyfriend. Plus I didn’t “click” with my Flat as much as I had hoped. My first year of university was a defining moment because it taught me so much about myself. I realised I am OK on my own, completely capable, but I wanted to be around people. I spent so much time alone, that now I try to make plans all the time, so I’m not. I almost exhausted my own company. Having said that, being alone doesn’t scare me as it used to. University also taught me to be independent. I didn’t automatically have those “life-long” friends from uni in my Halls, so I became that person who walks up and introduces themselves, asked if people to wanted to grab a coffee after lectures or meet up later on. This was SO out of my comfort zone, but I knew I didn’t want to feel isolated, so I did my best to make lots of friends. It actually worked and I met my two best University friends through having that little bit of extra courage. I came to the conclusion that being overly friendly isn’t a bad thing, that if all people can say about me is “she’s overly friendly” then I’m 100% OK with that. My initial sense of isolation and home sickness actually just pushed me to question myself, ask me who I wanted to be. Lonely wasn’t on my list, and friendless wasn’t either. So I forced myself out of my comfort zone. I still do this now. I have an added confidence in the fact that I’m a good human being. And if anything I’m more aware of other people’s feelings because of my experience.

(My University best friends, the ones I forced myself upon and have absolutely no regrets about!!!)

Defining Moment Number 2: is a rather random one. I can’t remember where we were when I heard it for the first time but I watched “We Bought a Zoo” a few years ago and the phrase “all you need is 10 seconds of courage” popped up. And since then it’s stuck with me. Through the difficulties at Uni, I would convince myself that all I needed was 10 seconds of courage. Once you’ve said “hi” that’s the hard bit out of the way. I used it for my first job at 15/16, in a huge store with loads of people I didn’t know. It helped me with handing in CVs (and resignations), with interviews, and dealing with situations I wasn’t comfortable in. 10 seconds, and it’s done. No take backs, just dealing with the consequences.

Defining Moment Number 3 is a little bit different. During my Freshers week I experienced something that a lot of women unfortunately experience in clubs. I had gone out with my flat and it was my first night of Freshers week. This experience really knocked my confidence. But it also proved to me that I knew what was and was not OK. And I like to think it’s made me a stronger person. I am very conscious in clubs, I’m constantly aware of my surroundings and actually find it quite hard to let my hair down and enjoy myself if I’m not with Jack. But it made me realise my worth. This is my body. I think recognising your worth, your value as a human being, is so important to a happy life. I genuinely believe I can do anything I want if I put my mind to it. I know I am as good as any man. This experience simply raised the question: are you ok with this? And the answer was hell no.

(This is a picture of Jack and I, in 2015, 1 week after Freshers. My family and him came to visit, and they were my rock!)

Of course I still have my insecurities, I most definitely have my (weekly/daily!) wobbles. But I would say that, now, I am confident in myself, as a person. I try hard to be the best version of myself.

I hope you enjoyed reading today’s blog.

What are your Defining Moments? Have you experience something similar to me? Let me know in the comments!

Bee xoxo

Top Ten Beauty Hacks

Top Ten Beauty Hacks

Hello everybody!

Today I am talking about my top ten beauty hacks that I use! I hope you enjoy!

1) Fixing smudged nail varnish

There is nothing worse than doing your nails and then catching them on something, putting a mighty finger print on it or fluff getting stuck on them. So I figured out this trick a few years ago and have been doing it ever since. When the nail varnish is tacky, but no longer wet, you can (and this is going to sound super weird) lick the nail varnish. You can flatten and smooth out any marks and nobody would even know you smudged your nails. Top tip: make sure it’s not still wet though, because that just tastes gross.

2) Having that big eye look.

Use a white eye-liner on your waterline to give your eyes a pop.

3) Keeping your lips healthy and looking pumped. 

carmex.jpg

I use the Carmex Lipbalm before I use any lipstick or lip gloss- it plumps up your lips and they never dry out. This works with matte lipsticks aswell.

4) Getting the perfect lip line. 

I intentionally brush the remnants of foundation from my brush over my lips, this means that when I apply my lipliner and lip stick I have a lighter base tone. This also helps because I always find that the skin around my lips can look a little pinker than other areas on my face.

5) When you buy the wrong shade foundation

I am the queen of mixing foudations. Sometimes it’s simply because I’m stingy, and other times it’s because I like the qualities of both foundations. If I want a full coverage look, but I perhaps haven’t tanned for a while, I will add a lighter shade of a different brand of foundation to the darker, full coverage one. This way I get the full coverage, but avoid the big orange line that no girl wants! This also works with foundations that you buy after holiday, when you’re that shade darker.

I personally use Rimmel Lasting Finish Foundation in the shade True Ivory (which was perfect after my holiday and is a total coverage foundations) and combine it with my L’Oreal Paris Colour Match Foundation in the shade 1N (which is more accurate now!).

6) Soap and Glory Wonderbronze Shimmer Brick

bronzer

This is one of the best products I have ever got. If I’m in a rush, I’ll use it as a bronzer, an eye shadow and will pick out the lighter tones (with a different brush) and use it for highlight as well. It also gives a lovely sun-tint that I always feel I’m lacking in the colder seasons. It’s a constant in my handbag for those moments I want to touch up my makeup!

7) Find that perfect lip colour- Tanya Burr, Pink Cocoa

pink cocoa

I searched for ages trying to find a lip stick that was just the right shade. I wanted one that I didn’t need to line my lips with and was a shade darker than my natural lip colour. This, for me, is Tanya Burr’s: Pink Cocoa, it’s so perfect and I can whack it out when I’m out and about to give my lips a little more colour but still look natural.

8) Give yourself a healing foot treatment while you sleep

Sometimes it’s nice to pamper yourself, but feet never seem to be at the top of my ‘pamper yo-self’ routine. I like to cover my feet in a thick moisturiser and go to bed with socks on- they feel like heaven the next day!

9) Spots vs. tooth paste/ sudocrem

If ever I am out at a friends and haven’t brought over my night time face routine with me (or even if I am super tired) I use tooth paste or sudocrem. Stupid though I may look, my spot’s are not going to be as aggravated the next day!

10) Run out of dry shampoo? Baby powder. 

I am blond, so maybe it works better on lighter hair, but this trick is legit! It works and lets face it, baby powder smells nice too. Double bonus.

These tricks are all ones that I use myself! I hope they are helpful!

Bee xoxox